Beating Yourself Up For Making Mistakes – How’s That Working Out?

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We’ve all done things that we are not proud of. It’s usually those moments in our life that make us who we are.

I bet that as you read this you’re thinking well, Giorgio, “There’s no way that you’ve done things as bad as I have” and I guarantee that others think the same about you.

It’s all a matter of perspective. What do you believe you have done that is shameful? Is it truly shameful or is that what you believe about your past actions? We go through life taking action on the things that we want and then someone will have some kind of over-exaggerated reaction to it, so in future situations, we begin to avoid taking these actions because we feel that what we did was shameful.

This is why you stop before you’ve even started.

The thing is, that what you believe is shameful someone else may think is honourable. It’s probably hard to believe, but that’s because you’ve believed for so long that your past action was shameful and you don’t know any different. It’s just a perception.

Consider this analogy. There’s a red rose. What you see is a red rose with thorns attached, but what I see is a thorny bush with beautiful red roses attached. Meanwhile, the rose bush hasn’t changed the whole time, yet 2 different people perceive it differently.

The same goes for whatever experiences you feel guilty or shameful about. You may not realise it, but someone else sees a thorny bush with beautiful red roses when they look at your “shameful” action. While you look back at your past and see a few roses surrounded by thick, sharp thorny bushes. All you have to do is change your perspective.

What you may not realise is how much this belief is actually subconsciously controlling your decisions and actions on a daily basis. Over time you set out to go and do something that is remotely similar to a past experience that was “shameful” (in your perception) so you stop yourself from doing it again because you believe it will cause more pain than pleasure to those around you. This leads you to believe that you made a mistake.

  • How long can you keep living that way?
  • How long can you sacrifice what you truly want for yourself in fear of stepping on the toes of people around you?
  • How will you ever truly live the life that you want for yourself without annoying or pissing some people off on the way?

The people throughout history that have had an impact on humanity and culture didn’t stop themselves because they were worried that a group of people didn’t like them. They embraced that people disliked them and continued to push through. In fact, they used the nay-saying haters as fuel.

If you’re not pissing a few people off on your journey, then you’re doing something wrong.

Give yourself permission to let go of that belief. Ask yourself how this belief about the past is helping you in your current life?

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